Friday, February 1, 2008

Missives from Virginia Departments

We had an ice storm overnight in Virginia. It knocked our electricity out for six hours (I swear we’re on the weiniest circuit in the city) and caused a two-hour delay for the school kids. One of the headlines on the front page of the paper today was “VDOT: Stay off roads Friday if icy.”

Thanks, VDOT. I will also remember to wash hands after using bathroom and turn cell phone off at movie theaters.

In other news, our dog Simon got a letter. Actually written as if Simon were reading it. (“Dear Simon, You recently visited Georgetown Veterinary Hospital and received your rabies vaccination…”) Apparently Virginia recently passed a law where vets have to inform the city when they give a dog a rabies shot.

On the one hand, the law makes no sense to me. We’re supposed to pay four bucks to register Simon, or they’ll let Animal Control Services know that an unlicensed dog lives here. And what? They'll take our elderly dog to the overcrowded shelter? Meanwhile, all the wingnuts who don’t vaccinate their dogs pay no money (in vet bills or licensing) and go unreported, yet pose the greatest risk for spreading rabies.

On the other hand, I love that the letter was addressed to Simon. That’s someone who’s making the most of his or her job. And he or she showed some nice restraint, too. If I were in charge of the letter, you best believe that there would be at least one line in there in which the city wonders “who’s a good boy? who is it? WHO'S THE GOOD BOY?”

It’s Simon. That’s who.

7 comments:

BarbaraCA said...

Simon should really write back and use his biggest words.

That would be cool.

Jennifer said...

Or the check could be signed with a paw print.

I think I'm getting dangerously close to LOL Cat territory here.

BabelBabe said...

this is wildly amusing to me for two very immature reasons: 1) My oldest son's name is Simon.
And sometimes I want to talk to him like I talk to our dog (whose name is Fred). "Simon! Sit! Stay! Good boy! Don't poop in the house (oh wait...)"

and 2) I just sent in the city dog license renewal without the photocopy of Fred's neutering papers. Instead, I attached a note saying, "They haven't grown back. Thank you." Think they'll send me the license renewal?

Jennifer said...

They'd better!

I love the name Simon--we just couldn't agree on it for a kid's name.

jessica said...

Simon SHOULD get mail. Dogs appreciate the outreach more than cats. Our cats get letters from the vet, too, reminding them that it's time for their vaccinations.

What the letters (postcards, really) SHOULD say is "get OFF of that, damn it!" (All cats are secretly named "Damn it." And I am a cat lover.)

Jennifer said...

Another good one for dogs would be Stop Licking That.

jessica said...

Ha! (As in why do dogs... because they can?)